Graduated from University!

Wednesday, July 9, 2014

I am a mixed bag of emotions right now. Having had a prolonged childhood (16 years of being a Singaporean student!), watching it end elicits a mixture of sadness and happiness. I have been living my life as a student that it seems surreal, almost like a dream to watch my education career end. It seems like my ability to be fully cognizant of my surroundings proceeds at a far slower pace than actual reality. Only now, a few hours after the ceremony has ended, in the morning did I finally grasp my current situation: I have graduated from University! Yesterday officially marked the last day of my undergraduate life!

Yesterday's 2014 commencement at 8 pm was a huge blur. Throngs of people - parents, professors, students, siblings, and friends - crowded the NUS Cultural Centre. The majority, including myself, were rushing through the crowd to find friends and professors to take commemorative pictures. There was a strong desire on our part to capture the moment, a beautiful memory, to serve as important reminders of who we were, what we did, who we met, and what we have accomplished.

I must admit, even though I am not excessively fond of my entire 2014 History cohort, especially the guys who had been acting arrogant and snobbish throughout the year, I will miss them greatly. I deeply treasure my moments, albeit few, with them. Honors year had been tough on us all. Because our grades are mainly based on our ability to gather information and produce a convincing essay, most of us spent days in the school library to source for materials, while a few others camped nights at school.

I could still remember - physically, emotionally and psychologically - the countless days when I had to travel back and fro to the school library to source for books. It was like an academic ritual. I would compile a list of books to read at the library, gather them, and then key in the important information. If I was lucky in my information-gathering, I would then proceed to write my essay. It usually took me around 2 to 3 drafts before I was actually satisfied. If it wasn't the grammar, it was a problem with my sentence structure. If it wasn't the contradicting information, it was the lack of evidence. It was really a love-hate relationship with this routine. I enjoyed the process because it undoubtedly yielded fresh insights, yet it was excruciatingly stressful especially when the dateline was always so near!

Having taken a total of 38 modules, the professor which most deeply impacted me was ironically a new professor who taught a History module called 'Culture and Literature of Southeast Asian History' just last semester. His name was Kelvin L. He was not like any regular professor who would immediately answer a student's question, especially if he thinks it's a good one. After a few daring souls chipped in their two cents, he would then phrase the question in a different angle, and ask even more questions. Most of us would either be left confused or strangely enlightened at this point. The entire point of his module was to get us thinking, to ask questions, even simple ones, and not look obsessively for answers. This is something we were all grateful to learn. Singapore's education system is so grade-driven that the mere knowledge process of being curious, asking questions and responding to them was lost.

After writing countless essays, the essay which I am most proud of was done for my Independent Study module. A mix of anthropology, history, and medicine, this essay was entitled, "Reinventing Neurasthenia in Modern China, 1900-1990." I was supervised by one of my favorite professors called Dr. Dimoia, who is an expert in medicine, science and technology, especially in South Korea. A total of 35 resources (books, journals, and conferences) and 5344 words, I never felt so happy upon completing this essay. It is my baby, my pride and joy, because I managed to conquer so many academic challenges while writing this essay. Reading medical journals about the disease was one thing, finding contradicting facts was another. I almost teared my hair out writing this paper. I am so glad I managed to piece everything together coherently and concisely. I have learnt so much just conducting research on the history of the disease!

Of course my education career was not just about studying, I met friends and my partner for life as well! There is the cute, highly independent and worldly-wise Cheche! The pretty, highly perceptive and mature Yenny! And the boisterous, adventurous, and hardworking Van! Finally, I met my darling Shijie! All of them have deeply impacted me in different ways. I love them all!

I am also very thankful to my history professors, Prof. Lockhart, Dr Brunero, Dr. Dimoia, Kelvin L., Prof. Amos, Prof. Teow, and Prof. Yang Bin. for making NUS an unforgettable learning experience! I will miss them greatly!

Reflecting upon all these now, yesterday did mark the end of my education career. But the learning and growing never ends. I am so grateful for having had the opportunity to study at NUS!

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posted at 10:15 AM

Social Creatures

Sunday, June 3, 2012

Girls are not complex creatures, the entire human race are.

Today, while I was reflecting back on my ups and downs with my university friends, realization dawned on me on how lonely humans are. We are constantly, or hope to be, surrounded by others - family and friends alike - precisely because we fear loneliness. We hate to be alone. This is why, when left to our own devices, we are in a constant search for things to do. Simple, mundane, everyday things such as working, playing that newly bought video game, reading a book, listening to music, and even creating a new artwork!

It has often been quoted: Art is the most intense form of individualism. How true this statement is! It is not just art, but even the aforementioned simple things in life we do that express individualism.

We do things to keep ourselves, our mind preoccupied, especially when we are left alone. For when we are alone, our minds tend to wander, inciting dreadful feelings such as desolation.

Perhaps an oft-quoted statement can aptly sum up the entire point of this article: Humans are social creatures.

And again, to end off this blog entry, I shall post my latest artwork just to keep up the tradition. ;)

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posted at 5:29 AM

Beautiful nature

Friday, February 17, 2012

Living in Singapore, a global city with skyscrapers lining the horizon, such videos depicting nature in all its glory make me want to throw down everything I'm doing, backpack, and live an ascetic life somewhere close to nature.

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posted at 9:13 PM

Feng Yu Jiu Tian craze

Saturday, January 28, 2012


I have just read finish all 27 volumes of Feng Yu Jiu Tian (鳳于九天), an epic Taiwanese Boys Love novel written by Feng Nong (風弄). To use just one sentence to aptly describe my current feelings would be: I felt my life has come to a complete halt, my thirst to know more is killing me from within! 

 Many (including you, my good reader for whatever reason brings you here) would believe me to be insane or at least a melodramatic individual whose exaggerated claims are better off used for a drama script. But voracious readers or at least fellow readers of Feng Yu Jiu Tian will, without hesitation, nod fervently in acknowledging how tormenting it is to wait for the next installment of a good book you find hard to put down! Put simply, if you had ever once been part of the 99.9% of the population waiting for J.K Rowling to complete her masterpiece and publish her Harry Potter novels, you are sure to comprehend and empathize with my current feelings of anxiety and restlessness.

 Getting back to the main topic, I was conveying how restless I am at having to wait for Feng Nong to complete volume 28. I cannot help but wonder...我是否能在這一生中等到，看到，讀到鳳於九天的結局嗎？In this lifetime, is it even possible for me to wait for, see and read the ending of Feng Yu Jiu Tian? I am pretty much convinced by the time I hit the age of 50, the Taiwanese novel might still be ongoing because the plot just keeps building up, loose ends are still left untied as one arc closes and another begins almost immediately, more characters (both major and minor) are being introduced, the main protagonists and antagonists are in a continuous process of development, and the overarching goal of the narrative (I refer to Rong Tian and Feng Ming's ambitious plan to unite all 11 kingdoms under one single ruler, the Xi Lei King Rong Tian himself) is far from being achieved. Both directly and indirectly, Ruo Yan's malevolent plots to capture Feng Ming and possess him completely in body and spirit impede efforts made by Rong Tian to reclaim his throne and thus set in motion plans to conquer other kingdoms.

Before I continue my ramblings, I shall provide more descriptions of the main characters just to exhibit my great love for these fictional beings! Oh, how I wish they were real~!


Ruo Yan

Ruo Yan (若言). King of Li Guo (離國). Having witnessed Feng Ming's lovable character and remarkable intelligence, Ruo Yan is deeply smitten by Feng Ming, much to the latter's dismay and misfortune, to the degree of possessiveness. He is willingly to sacrifice anything just to attain Feng Ming. Ruo Yan's feelings for Feng Ming are highly ambivalent . On one hand, he displays worry and concern when Feng Ming is in distress, on the other hand, he does not bat an eyelid when 'abusing' Feng Ming's body. However, it is undeniable that Ruo Yan habors romantic feelings for Feng Ming.


Highly intelligent. Brilliant military strategist. Manipulative. Malicious.



Before I end this blog entry abruptly (it is already 4 plus in the morning!), I shall shamelessly showcase my latest digital art recently submitted to DeviantArt.



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posted at 3:52 AM

The Legend of Sun Knight

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

I just finished reading the Legend of Sun Knight novel... Or, should I say, I finished reading what can be read! Argh! This is aggravating! The suspense is killing me! I need the last installment of this series!

I must say, the author 御我 is really something. Her light novel series got me hooked for hours on end that turned me, someone who abhors learning the Chinese language since secondary school, to a Chinese reader! This unexpected development scared even my parents who expressed concern and worry that perhaps studying has loosened a few screws in my brain. I assured them though that my sudden interest in Chinese novels has less to do with breaking down under pressure and more to do with the interesting stories themselves. This is coupled with the fact that I AM Chinese in the first place, so reading Chinese novels IS a perfectly normal behavior and not something to be alarmed about.

Speaking of being alarmed, I was unpleasantly surprised by Grisia Sun's latest character change in the novel. Grisia Sun turned into a complete....to put it very bluntly, bastard! An evil, sadistic, and manipulative bastard. This is not to say that he was not such a character before he willingly underwent the ceremony to become a demon king. In fact, Grisia the Sun Knight has always been highly manipulative and at times vindictive when matters concerning his dearly cherished twelve holy knights arise! But during those times, Grisia's basic motive underlying all his manipulative schemes and methods was to protect his fellow holy knights!

However, Grisia the Demon King is now merely concocting plans for personal gratification, without a single strand of remorse, guilt, or care for the lives of others. To Grisia, people's lives, including that of his subordinates and former twelve Holy Knights companions, are mere playthings to satiate his desire for...enjoyment. One line from the chapter nicely sums up his current temperament:

「親愛的沉默之鷹。」我故意說起等陽以前說過的話：「如你所願，我是個不會毀滅半個世界的魔王，比起毀滅世界這麼無聊的舉動，我更喜歡玩遊戲，希望你會喜歡我的遊戲。」

"My dear Silent Eagle," I deliberately mention Deng Yang's previous words, "As you wish, I am a Demon King who will not destroy half the world, compared to the boring action of destroying the world, I like playing games more, I hope you will enjoy my games."

GRISIA SUN, YOU ARE SUCH A COLD-HEARTED BASTARD. But this is probably why I love Grisia so much! However, I must admit, I still prefer Grisia's previous personality whereby he spews nonsensical stuff about the "Under the God of Light's grace...blah blah blah...the God of Light will forgive all those who bask under his light...etc etc...." and his strong sense of camaraderie! A Grisia Sun who cares not for his comrades and only himself is NOT Grisia Sun! I really hope the twelve holy knights will rescue Grisia from this cesspool of madness.

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posted at 10:32 PM

Holiday Rants

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Exams are finally over and holidays just started! So I'm going spend a great deal of time ranting about my past few days of blissfulness!



One Piece is the best anime/manga in the world! The plot is filled with action and humor. For someone like me who enjoys getting a good laugh out of shows, One Piece suits perfectly. I'm honestly shocked that I did not discover this long running anime years ago! So right now, I'm taking my time to catch up with the latest episodes.

I absolutely adore Luffy! His silliness, strong sense of camaraderie, innocence, and conviction make him quite easily my favorite anime character. Other Shounen anime/manga heroes like Allen Walker from D. Gray Man, Uzumaki Naruto from Naruto, and Natsu Dragneel from Fairy Tail tend to suffer from this pervasive sense of self-pity/hatred/guilt. However, Monkey D. Luffy does not. When Luffy meets a strong adversary or faces defeat, he wills himself to stand up, strengthens himself, and launches into another battle.

Apart from falling in love with One Piece, I'm also watching Durarara!!. I'm in love with the ending theme song! (The song is playing right now.) Is that strange?



MOST IMPORTANTLY, I finally bought The Legend of Sun Knight volumes from Kinokuniya. I was really surprised that the bookstore held LSK volumes! The story is written in traditional Chinese so for someone like me who learned only simplified Chinese in school, it's taking quite a while to digest the contents. Oh! The hell I put myself through to consume a good story!



You can read the english version from two sources: LSK blogspot or Prince Revolution.

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posted at 3:24 AM

Close to breaking point

Sunday, October 23, 2011

I finally understand why the suicide rates in Singapore are escalating at an alarming rate. I may not be an adolescent reaching the age of puberty, claiming that the "World is so goddamn unfair. Why should I live?!", or a psychologically challenged teenager who derives sadistic pleasure in slashing her wrists. Far from it. I love my family, friends, and perhaps...my life when it is not buried under piles of academic work.

Let me put it across nicely. I'm your average undergraduate who has survived for the past few weeks on 2 hours of sleep and red bull in order to finish off her seemingly insurmountable assignments. And I'm barely done. I have two more essays to go before my examinations start. My brain is overly saturated. I think I might explode any time now.

And the government wonders why youth these days are dropping off dead?

So help me lord, please give me the strength and perseverance to endure for another month till my term ends! I fear I may be losing it soon....

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posted at 8:42 PM

Feng Yu Jiu Tian (鳳于九天)

Saturday, August 6, 2011

Oh my good lord! I think I may have just found the perfect Yaoi (Boy's Love) romance novel in the entire world - Feng Yu Jiu Tian (鳳于九天). (I am NOT exaggerating at all in saying this). I can't even begin to express how absolutely thrilled and euphoric I am to have stumbled across this marvelous Chinese literature! This is the first Chinese novel to have made me wish that I was perhaps more gifted in my Mother Tongue and had taken my learning in the Chinese language more seriously.

Putting the issue of language barrier aside, I will spend a little more time to explain the reason for my joy in finding this precious Chinese novel by Feng Nong.

Before I begin however, here's a little summary about Feng Yu Jiu Tian.


Feng Ming was only 19 when he lost his life saving a child from death without hesitation. The grateful father of the rescued child grants Feng Ming a second chance at life. Unknown to Feng Ming, his soul is whisked away to a far away ancient land (resembling the dynasties of China). Upon waking up, he finds himself inhabiting the frail body of Thunder Kingdom's crowned prince who is also graced with the title of the most beautiful man across all the lands. However, his beauty has a price as he attracts the unwanted attention of the minister of affairs, Rong Tian who finds every reason to torment the prince mentally and physically. As Feng Ming starts to get a hold of the conspiracies surrounding him, what will happen when the prince's true identity is revealed? And what happened to the 'real' prince?




You can find the English translated version of the novel here: http://sookybabi.livejournal.com/.



Feng Ming, the most beautiful uke to have ever graced my eyes, is an absolutely delightful character! He is quite unlike the usual 'play submissive' or 'act spoilt' uke, but instead has a distinctive personality of his own. He is quick-witted, a tad naive, childish at some point in time, and also a remarkable genius with the brains of a typical university student from the 21th century. The fusion of his extraordinary beauty and intelligence captures the heart of the wise and handsome King Rong Tian. He also has a deep and undying love for Rong Tian.










Rong Tian is our seme who is not quite the gentleman but not quite the cold-blooded whip-in-hand villain either. He is ruthless and unrelenting in the world of politics, but carries a soft and tender heart towards Feng Ming. He is so devoted and deeply in love with Feng Ming that not even a maiden of goddess-like proportions can stir his heart. Also, his love and dedication to Feng Ming runs so deep that when his lover was kidnapped by Ruo Yan (a king from another kingdom who also harbors a love interest towards Feng Ming), he would willingly engage in an open war to rescue Feng Ming.





The interaction between the two lovers is so endearing! I can't help but gush and squeal about the way they whisper words of promises and sweet-nothings to one another. These are some of the few famous lines spoken by the two steadfast lovers.

天下壮丽江山 吴与你共享
世间轰烈快事 吾与你分尝
惟有灾难 吾一人独挡

I will share this beautiful world together with you.
I will share this world's most happiest things with you.
Only disaster I will bear it alone.
- Rong Tian to Feng Ming

纵使成为十一国之主 你是我的容恬
纵使兵败国亡 你是我的容恬
就像我 永远是你的凤鸣

Even though you become the king of the 11 kingdoms, you are my Rong Tian.
Even though you lose in the battle, you are my Rong Tian.
Just like me, I am always your Feng Ming.
- Feng Ming to Rong Tian


There is a manga based on the Chinese novel itself, which you can easily find on any manga site, but the manga artist Wang Yi takes quite a fair bit of time to update so the manga has only covered Volume 1 of the novel. I would therefore recommend any Yaoi fans to read the novel first. You won't be disappointed. ;)

This is a beautiful cosplay video of Feng Yu Jiu Tian which I found on youtube. The dude with the red hair is Rong Tian, and the brown Feng Ming. The beautiful lady is a character which I'm not yet familiar with, though I suspect she is Rong Tian's old flame.


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posted at 12:00 AM

The Tormented (Deviantart)

Tuesday, June 21, 2011





Another dark photo-manipulation which I promptly finished soon after returning from my holiday trip to Hong Kong, Zhuhai, ShenZhen, and Macau (11th to 17th of June). I have no wish to speak about the holiday because, frankly, it has been like a dream - short-lived, thoroughly pleasant and enjoyable, fleeting - that ended all too soon. Perhaps I will speak at length about my holiday trip when my mood lightens.

On another note, I am aware that I have been neglecting my blog, save for the occasional entries about my recent artworks. Hence, for this entry, I shall spend a little more effort in composing a slightly more entertaining and informative content.

So, for starters, let's see what I have been up to... Nothing noteworthy in particular.. I've finished reading Norwegian Wood by my favorite author Haruki Murakami during my Hong Kong trip. The phrase that struck me most and that has remained firmly etched in my mind is: "Life is here, death is over there. I am here, not over there."

After closing the book, I was left stumbled and forced upon myself a reassessment of my purpose in living and direction in life. The answers I am looking for are not simply about academic nourishment to ensure one's advancement in office so as to return in abundance material and emotional wealth to my loved ones. It was...more than that. Much, much more. Unfortunately, as I am philosophically unenlightened, I have not managed to derive a satisfactory answer.

Where do our loved ones dwell after being freed from their physical bonds? Where do we go when we share the same fate? Heaven? Hell? Nowhere? I am not plunging into a long debated religious discussion about who goes where and why...It's just a simple question which we can expect a simple answer for.

We do not die, for such a possibility does not exist. We may have departed from the physical world, but our spirits remain for ever. So, once again, I reiterate: where do our spirits go? Is there really another world out there? Another dimension whose existence we are not aware of?

Of course, by posing those questions, I have already made an assumption that we are indeed living, and are not simply brains in a vat believing our 'lives' into existence. Even if the brain-in-a-vat scenario is true, it still points towards the probability of existence of this other world.

Well, it is PRECISELY because such philosophical thoughts consume me, taking up a good portion of my worldly concerns, that I may end up an asylum patient one day.

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posted at 2:50 AM

New phone

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

I hate to say it but I am a conformist and a hypocrite to boot. I have been throwing derisive remarks regarding iphone users, saying that all iphone users are mindless conformists and propagators of Apple mass production. Yet here I am holding an iphone in all its shiny sleek metallic veneer.

I was offered two choices. I could either wait for N8 Nokia to be released in Singapore next year or purchase an iphone right now right then. Me being...well an impatient young woman quickly jumped at the opportunity to get a new phone.

My sister, equally backward as I am, has been influenced to purchase an iphone too. Looks like my entire family is conformist.

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posted at 9:29 PM

Stay sane!

Friday, October 8, 2010

I'm blogging not because I'm too darn free to do anything else with my time, in fact the seismic proportions of my workload brings ME to tears, but because I was drowned by a vengeful desire to unleash my pent-up grievances and lament for my current state of disenchantment and disgruntlement.

That is not to say however that I will be plunging random readers such as yourself with angsty sob stories of self-loathing but rather to remind myself of the purpose of my undertaking.

All right, so before I further debase the contents of my blog with manifestations of psychosis, I would like to personally throttle those who posited that the University life is 'easier' compared to Junior College because of the degree of autonomy we, university students, exercise. Nonsense! Utter rubbish!

I won't bother justifying my blatant outcry, for I simply do not possess the time to do so, but I would just like to yell out (to myself) "STAY SANE RAIN! DON'T LOSE YOURSELF NOW!"

It won't surprise you to know that I'm struggling to keep my sanity and mental acumen intact... supposing they exist in the first place.. for I have always been an eccentric individual.

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posted at 2:25 AM

Weekend Getaway

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Given the opportunity I was to change my study environment did I very quickly accept the offer, sparkly smiles and all, sincerely hoping that my decision to efficiently utilize my time there would not fall through easily for I have sought to divest myself of the sinful temptation of my own house which is filled with all sorts of miscellaneous devices a hardcore gamer would be envious of.

I will be leaving tomorrow, with my family and Aunt Karen, to Malaysia Genting Highlands at 1 am, returning only on Sunday. I do hope Malaysia's Starbucks has Wireless Internet!

On a completely unrelated note, this is a song I have been obsessing over - Promise Me by The Birthday Massacre. The Birthday Massacre is severely underrated; they deserve much more recognition than other commercial and mainstream bands - names I shall leave anonymous least I get a handful of trolls on my trail!

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posted at 9:01 PM

Love Song Requiem

Thursday, August 26, 2010

It is a first for me working on a layout without my usual solid black or monochrome colors, or the usual use of heavy textures for my design. I had chanced upon a png render of Kaito a Vocaloid character on planetrenders.net and was overwhelmed by an inspiration to design using bright colors, so I had grasped the opportunity to move out of my comfort zone and try something new.

After critically assessing my design, I can honestly say with every intent at self-disparagement my aptitude for designing is severely lacking and it was a wise decision to discard my prior, youthful aspiration as a web designer or an arts illustrator.

On a different vein, I have recently stumbled upon on a beautiful, tear-jerking song called 'Love Song Requiem' by an old band Trading Yesterday (currently known as Age of Information), I thus wish to share this song with those out there who have/had lost a loved one.

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posted at 10:08 PM

Phone Post!

Monday, August 23, 2010

Before I dedicate the remaining hours of the day to a life of a historian (I use this term very loosely for reading zealously has impressed upon me as an innate, fundamental nature of a Historian.), I have decided to exercise liberty with regards to the personal indulgence which for the past week has been denied to me owing to the constrains of both time and personal matters that needed attending to.

I have but 2 thick readings, for both my History exposure module and Japanese General Education Module, piled neatly on top of my desk, waiting for the pages to be flipped, waiting to be read. By god, will I ever be able to sleep tonight?

But self-lamenting over my bad time management has to be put aside for now (I dare think 99.9% of my blog posts are concerned most predominantly by my academic issues.) for I have designed a new method to complement/substitute the incessant ramblings which I had ungraciously poured onto this blog. I call it the 'Phone Post!' xD

For boredom pervaded my being and I, restless at having waited long for the inconsistent arrival of my bus, typed into my phone a little story, a drabble if you may wish to call it.

So this is my first drabble.
I love you but you are not mine, I will hold you in my prison regardless for your absence will be my undoing. Run. Run. Relentlessly will I pursue and hound your every footsteps till your last breath of resistance and hatred fades into the countenance of the dark sky. Finale. A fine work of art you are; a beauty discolored first by the blade which has your eyes reflect of a perpetual fear, bathed next in your pool of crimson freshness. I love you.. now you are mine... And now, you are mine.

And then my bus came swerving around the bend!

I did a little image search on a Japanese tragic hero, Minamoto No Yoshitsune, having been enthralled by my Japanese readings' (Nobility of Failure by Ivan Morris) glorifying depiction of this Samurai warrior as an "effeminate beauty, slender figure and beautiful, feminine features."



It is quite apparent of which, in a sane person's perception, images above contains a higher level of realism and resemblance to the actual hero himself. But for the sake of bringing greater love and entertainment to my study of the Japanese Heian Period, I shall very obstinately stick to the former's depiction of Yoshitsune. xD

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posted at 7:03 PM

The Idea of Japan?

Thursday, August 12, 2010

I am currently reading 'The Idea of Japan - Western Images, Western Myths' by Ian Littlewood. I couldn't help but sneak a smile at the image of Japan the Europeans had constructed since the eighteen century. What they had created by simplifying the complexities involved in Japan's social institutions were by no means palatable images but to some degree carried a certain measure of truth in and of itself.

I quote from Homer Lea, 'The Valor of Ignorance', "..Japan is pregnant with the spirit of militarism." and Harcourt-Smith "murderous perfidy" of the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor in December 1941. The chapter, Samurai - A Streak of Violence, subsequently surmises the Japanese as wearing veneers of "post-war friendliness".

I found it particularly hilarious, despite the severity and fury in content, for the West could construct the image of Japan as a country innate with belligerence and aggression, but none could ever deny the celerity and wits the Japanese possess. ;)

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posted at 8:44 PM

Day 1 of University Life

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

The first day of my university life officially started today at 8 am sharp. I learned a couple of interesting facts which originated from the standardized conception of the Samurai image. I must admit to taking up this module with an ulterior motive. xD

Like any other Otaku, I would love for nothing more than to comprehend the complexities involved in the underlying roots of the Japanese society - how stereotypes came into being, and the culture icons which has in long years given Japan the 'image' it has today.

That was basically the gist of my Japanese lecture today. My history lecture was pretty amusing, I was lucky to have a hilarious lecturer. :) I must say though, the readings for both my Japanese GEM and History exposure module are sure to consume a good portion of my life.

On another note, I decided to give myself another holiday and got hold of 2 new NDS games. Atelier Annie - Alchemist of Sera Island (RPG) and Will O' Wisp (Simulation)

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posted at 12:10 AM

A poignant aftertaste

Thursday, August 5, 2010

An overwhelming urge to cry washed over me, thus I decided to pen down these beautiful, ephemeral emotions before I lose its essence. Do not be fooled by the structure, I have written, not a poem, but a prose - writing in my stream of consciousness would be a more apt description. In other words, it contains no literacy value. So read on, enjoy and be bewildered in trying to establish some sense from it.

My heart, it shivers,
searing from the core, bellows
to be released from the skeleton fingers
It clutches. Stifling me of breath,
of words left sealed in my throat.
Tears do not find me.
They fell from within.
From my inside do they drown
the remnant fragments of my soul.


At times was I possessed by a sudden urge to scream, to cry, or to close my eyes forever that I simply could not disregard the poignant aftertaste it had left me. The pain, the worry, the pressure - pieces of these emotions would remain. A thought hence ran through my mind.

While on the brink of unconsciousness, one usually calls slumber, have you ever closed your eyes and wondered 'What if I cease to open my eyes, would this darkness be of an eternal dimension to me?'

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posted at 5:12 PM

The self-proclaimed Hermit

Sunday, August 1, 2010

I'm planning to be a recluse, whether in the future or the present, so part me not from my computer but from the world around me!

My parents have been incessantly grumbling of my blatant disregard for interpersonal relationships and of course, the necessity of forming such relations. I had vehemently opposed to partake in my University's camps and socializing parties, choosing instead to bond with my fictional written characters on my computer screen.

They spoke to me! "Discard us not for our lives are shallow! We will die! We will die!" Or something to that effect.

My parents are convinced that there's a screw loose in my brain. In the nutshell, they believed me to be insane. "You're crazy la, so free to write stories!"

And I had told them levelly that should there be an earthquake outside our flat, I would still choose to pen down my ideas, thoughts and characters into Microsoft Word, because I quite plainly love writing.

Nonsensical, or not.

And no, I didn't retort to that statement of me being 'crazy'.

Alas! The sands of time has run out for the recluse! I must part, tomorrow, from my shell and SOCIALIZE with REAL people! Fast dread fills me! I tremble! (Actually, I'm only attending my FASS Orientation with my friends tomorrow. That is all. But I will let you know if anything terrifying happens to me.)

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posted at 11:38 PM

A Freshman's Worry

Friday, July 30, 2010

My mind is wrought with trepidation. My heart unsettled. And the reason for it is quite simply due to the bidding of my modules. The bids are steadily increasing and all one could do is watch as an investor would to a Stock Market.

My selected modules are as follows: EN1101E, HY1101E, EC1101E, SE1101E.

JS1101E was a module of my interest. Upon further reading on the details and student reviews regarding this module however, the heavy projects it entails was enough deterrence to override my interest. I quite simply dropped the module and, for practicality, selected Southeast Asian Studies – a topic which I studied at length during my A Levels.

To ease my mental distraught, I decided to work on a new D.Gray-Man fanfiction which features the lovely Allen Walker and Kanda Yuu. The genres would be tragedy and drama.

Writing has always been a solace.

How does one sleep knowing the end of module bidding approaches in mere hours?

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posted at 12:13 AM

Defective hard drive?!!

Saturday, June 12, 2010

Yes, it was about time I returned from my hiatus and started drifting back to earth... You wouldn't guess what happened during my vacation in Mars! My computer's hard drive finally relented to the constant exposure of extreme heat and excessive usage...

According to the Harvey Norman guy who came to repair our computer, the motherboard was defective and he had to wipe out and restore everything. He asserted the possibility of our programs and files being corrupted due to the defect in the hard drive

"Can I at least save my Sim3 Custom Content elsewhere?"

"No. It's risky. It might be corrupted too."

I almost cried.

Thanks to this defective Acer computer, I lost ALL my documents... meaning my fanfictions, Anime Music Videos, Windows Movie Maker effects, digital artworks, Adobe photoshop folder, games and some other nonsense. SO, I had to painstakingly nurse this computer back to its original settings seeing as to how EVERYTHING was gone from the desktop.

This desktop is like a plain sheet of paper that was otherwise scribbled with lots of stuff.

Oh wells, give and take, I'm glad Ren stopped throwing tantrums.

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posted at 4:57 AM